But Do You Have a Plot? Bad Girl whittles Popular Fiction Bootcamp down to 10 minutes…

As seen on SLEUTHSAYERS today, repeated here for my regular readers:  

By Melodie Campbell (Bad Girl) 

Last month, I wrote about Endings, and reader expectations for each of the main genres.  The response was positive, and some people have asked that I bring more stuff from class onto these pages.  So here are some notes from the very beginning, class 1, hour 1.

People often ask what comes first: character or plot?

Do you start with a character?  Or do you start with a plot?
This is too simplistic.

Here’s what you need for a novel:
A main character
With a problem or goal
Obstacles to that goal, which are resolved by the end.

PLOT is essential for all novels.  It’s not as easy as just sitting down and just starting to write 80,000 words.  Ask yourself:
What does your main character want?  Why can’t he get it?

Your character wants something.  It could be safety, money, love, revenge…

There are obstacles in the way of her getting what she wants.  THAT PROVIDES CONFLICT.

So…you need a character, with a problem or goal, and obstacles to reaching that goal.  Believable obstacles that matter.  Even in a literary novel.

There must be RISK.  Your character must stand to lose a lot, if they don’t overcome those obstacles.  In crime books, it’s usually their life.

So…you may think you have a nice story of a man and woman meeting and falling in love, and deciding to make a commitment.  Awfully nice for the man and woman, but dead boring for the reader.  Even in a romance, there must be obstacles to the man and woman getting together.  If you don’t have obstacles, you don’t have conflict, you don’t have a plot, and you don’t have a novel.

Put another way:
When X happens, Y must do Z, otherwise ABCD will happen.
That’s what you need for a novel.

GIVE YOUR CHARACTER GOALS

1. Readers must know what each character’s goals are so they can keep score.

2. Goals must be clearly defined, and they must be evident from the beginning.

3. There must be opposition, which creates the possibility of losing.
   >>this conflict makes up your plot<<
4. Will the character achieve his goal?  Readers will keep turning pages to find out.

If you don’t provide goals, readers will get bored. 
They won’t know the significance of the ‘actions’ the hero takes.

To Conclude:
Until we know what your character wants, we don’t know what the story is about.
Until we know what’s at stake, we don’t care.

Why I could never be a Modern Fiction Novel Heroine

Let’s call her Tiffany.  Nah, too twee.  How about Jen.  Meet our

fiction heroine, Jen.  She’s a modern girl. Has her own condo. Drives a car. Lives in the city. Has a meaningful job.  All in all, a typical modern heroine of a fiction novel.    

Sounds reasonable, but I couldn’t be her.  I’m all for ‘suspension of disbelief’ in fantasy, but my world requires more human elements.  To wit:

THINGS THAT BUG ME ABOUT MODERN FICTIONAL HEROINES

1.  They look great all the time.

By this I mean: she gets up in the morning, perfect quaffed.  She dons clothes for her work day.  Maybe goes for a jog.  And spends absolutely no time in front of the mirror swabbing on makeup or doing her hair.  Did you ever notice fiction novel heroines look great in the morning without doing anything?  They may have a shit-load of angst about their personal lives, but apparently, they have Barbie doll hair.

As of immediately, name of heroine is changed to Barbie.

2.  They never eat.

Oh, they got out to dinner a lot.  You may even hear them order food.  But when it comes, do they ever eat it?  No! Barbie is far too busy arguing with her dinner companion, and then getting upset.

So many books, so many meals where our intrepid plucky heroine says, “oh my, I’m so upset, I couldn’t eat a thing.”

What is it with these feeble women who can’t eat?  Who the hell are they?  What do they exist on? 

When I’m upset, I eat, dammit.  Gotta fuel up for the famine that’s going to come sometime in the next 400 years.

If I hear another TSTL heroine say she’s too upset to eat, I’m going to shove the virtual dinner in her vapid virtual face and watch her choke to death.  Oh.  But then someone would have to rescue her.

EAT THE DAMN MEAL.

3.  They never go to the bathroom.

Twenty-four hours a day, we’re with this dame.  Does she ever go to the loo?  I mean, for other than a quick swipe of lipstick and a gabfest with friends?

Do none of these women have periods?

Do they not have to offload some by-products?  EVER?

Oh right.  Barbie is always too upset to eat a thing.  Therefore, nothing to offload. What was I thinking?

Cranky author disclosure:  Just so you know, Gina Gallo of The Goddaughter series loves her food.  You’ll see her eat it.  She sneaks off to the bathroom (offstage, so don’t freak.)  She looks like shit in the morning. Just like me.  Even Rowena of my fantasy books goes to the outhouse and enjoys her meals.  (Not at the same time.)

When is a Mystery not a Mystery? (Plus introduction of Authors' Milk)

Homeless.  Not me, luckily.  I still have four walls and a roof plus dog on the couch.  

But my kick-ass story “The Dame Was Trouble,” that had a wonderful future and clear economic security is now homeless.

The genres are tricky things.  If I write a mystery and set it in the past, it’s considered a historical mystery.  So, if we are classifying it, we would call it a Mystery first, and then Historical, as a subgenre of mystery genre.  Everyone’s happy.  

But what if I set it in the future?

This is exactly what has happened to me recently.  For the very first time, I was asked to write a crime story for an anthology, without going through the usual submission process.  The anthology had the delightful premise:  anything goes.  That is, I could write any subgenre, and set it anywhere, anytime.  *rubs hands in delight*

A particular story had been percolating in my brain for weeks, pounding to get out.  My friends and readers know that I like writing from the other side of the crime spectrum.  In The Goddaughter series, I write from the point of view of a mob Goddaughter who really doesn’t want to be one, but keeps having to pull off heists to bail out her family.  The books are fun, and weirdly, justice is done by the end, regardless of her family connections. 

So this new story was going to feature a kick-ass female marshal from the witness protection program.  Her job is to arrange the ‘hide’ after someone has testified in court.  Thing is, the transportation is by space travel, because the plot is set far in the future.

I sent it to the anthology editors.  They loved it.  One of my best twists ever, they said.  They liked the fact that it was hard-edged – unusual for me.  I breathed a sigh of relief.  And then two months later, they came back.  The publisher was having second thoughts.  He thought the science fiction setting would not be a good fit for a mystery anthology.  *author reaches for gun*

So they asked if they could reprint one of my award-winning stories instead.  I gave them a favourite (Hook, Line and Sinker) that was also hard-edged.  This story shortlisted along with one of Margaret Atwood's for a major prize (Atwood won.)  It would have a second life, which is always nice.

Meanwhile, I had this story on my hands, one that everyone loved, written especially for an anthology, that was now homeless.  *pass the scotch*

This was the time of Bouchercon 2017 in Toronto.  I was hanging with the AHMM gang, who were recording me reading my own work, Santa Baby, for a podcast to go up on their site.  (It’s there now *does happy dance*)  So I asked if they would be interested in reading it.

Sure, was the answer.  Sometimes they publish stories set in the near future.  I didn’t think this one would qualify.  I was right.

They didn’t take it.  But they did suggest sending it to their sister Dell mag, Asimov’s Science Fiction Mag.  So I did.  I’m waiting to hear.

My point is this:  Usually, we classify a story as a mystery if the plot is a mystery.  The setting comes second.  A historical mystery is still classified as a mystery.  A mystery with a strong romance element is still a mystery if the plot is a mystery plot.  But in the case of a future setting, it doesn’t matter what the plot is.  The setting is key to the classification.

I probed a bit among my author contacts.  One said that he had written a series billed as sci-fi mystery, and this was his baffling and witty conclusion:  he managed to alienate the mystery readers, and confuse the sci-fi readers.  Sales were a lot better when they reclassified the thing as sci-fi only

So to answer that initial question:  When Is a Mystery not a Mystery?  When it’s set in the future. *swigs from bottle*

Final thought: I hope they have scotch in the future. (Authors' milk. You read it here first.)

 

In Which My Characters Go Completely Out of Control...part 1

by Melodie Campbell (Bad Girl, aka Mom)

Recently, my characters have become more mouthy. 

I like to think of myself as their creator.  Without me, they wouldn’t have a life on the page, or anywhere, for that matter.  This should buy me a certain amount of respect, I figure.  Sort of like you might give a minor deity.

Unfortunately, my characters haven’t bought into that.  Worse, they seem to have cast me into the role of mother.  That’s me: a necessary embarrassment for the perpetuation of their lives.  And like all kids, they squabble.  They fight with each other for attention.  I liken it to sibling jealousy.

To wit:

“You haven’t written about me lately,” says Rowena.

I try to ignore the petulance in her voice.

“Been busy,” I mumble.  “Gina had to get married in Vegas.  And a relative of hers started a vigilante group.”

“I don’t care if she started a rock group.  You’re supposed to be writing MY story.”

I turn away from the keyboard and frown at her.  “Look, toots.  You wouldn’t have any stories at ALL if it weren’t for me.  You’ve had three books of adventures with men.  A normal gal would be exhausted.  So please be patient and wait your turn.  Jennie’s story comes out this Sept. in Worst Date Ever.  Del and The B-Team will be up next, in February.  You can be after that, maybe.”  Maybe.  I wasn’t going to tell her about the 6^th Goddaughter currently in the works.

“It’s not fair.  I came first!  Before all those silly mob comedies,” Row whines.  “Don’t forget!  I was the one who got you bestseller status.”  She points at her ample chest.

“Hey!” Says Gina, fresh from cannoli central.  “And which book won the Derringer and the Arthur Ellis?  Not some trashy old fantasy novel.”

“Who are YOU calling trashy?”  says Rowena, balling her hands into fists.  “Just because my bodice rips in every scene….”

“Like THAT isn’t a plot device,” chides Gina.

“Oh, PLEASE don’t fight,” says Jennie, the plucky romance heroine.  “I just want everyone to have a Happy Ever After.  Can’t you do that for us all, Mom?  Er…Melodie?”

I look at Del.  “What do you think?”

Del shrugs.  “Sounds sucky.  What kind of crap story would that be?  Bugger, is that the time?  I gotta job that needs doing.  Cover for me, will you Ritz?  And this time, let me know if the cops start sniffing around.”

“Cops?”  says Gina.  “Crap!  I’m outta here.” The door slams.

“Cops?” says Row.  “There’s that little matter of Steve’s body in book 2…” She vanishes.

“Cops?” says Jennie, hopefully.  “OH! Is one of them single?”

STILL ON SALE UNTIL JULY 15!  ALL THE IMAJIN BOOKS BY MELODIE CAMPBELL  (SEE POST BELOW)

It's HERE! THE GODDAUGHTER CAPER Now Available in stores and online

THE GODDAUGHTER CAPER!

Book 4 in the hilarious award-winning series featuring mob goddaughter Gina Gallo,

who is having a hard time leaving the family business.

Now Available in Chapters, Indigo, Barnes & Noble, Amazon and all the usual suspects!

Strange things are happening in Steeltown. 

A body shows up in the trunk of Gina's car. 

Another is mistakenly delivered to her cousin Nico's store.
And then Gina and Nico stumble across a stash of empty coffins! 

Worse, everything points to her own retired relatives at the Holy Cannoli Retirement Home....

What critics have said about The Goddaughter:

“Just right for Janet Evanovich fans…impossible not to laugh”  Library Journal

“Hilarious”  Ellery Queen Mystery Magazine

On Amazon

Chapters/Indigo