Call me a stick in the mud, but I don’t like Christmas. Every year our house gets filled with all those strange sounds and smells.
Signed Hum Bug
They’re called relatives.
Help! All these Christmas chores need to be done and I’m exhausted. What can I do? The baby was sick again and kept me up all night.
Sorry honey, but you married him.
I’m a rather well-heeled gent dating a younger lady. Is it crude to give money for Christmas?
Of course not! I like my men the cruder the better.
I love the old Christmas traditions. Do you still hang stockings by the fireplace?
Signed Sweet Sue
Frankly, I hadn’t thought of it. But really, it wouldn’t be a whole lot of fun. They’re already dead, aren’t they?
Morticia will return before Christmas unless Santa promises to be really crude.