Wednesday, 6 December 2017

Worst Typos EVER – Take 2! (For Marilyn, and everyone who contributed plot lines)

 
It happened again, and this time it was my fault. 

You know how it happens. Spellchecker has an evil twin that changes your word by one letter, and you don’t notice it until it goes to print. Public becomes Pubic. Corporate Assets becomes Corporate Asses. The Provincial Health Minister becomes Provincial Health Monster. We’ve all been there. (At least I have.  These were real typos from my department when I was a corporate PR director. Which is why I write comedy now.)

What kills me is, you make one teeny mistake (okay, it was a whopper) and the world chimes in. THAT’s when you get noticed. 

Readers may recall that last year, I wasn’t too happy when the virtual blog tour company hired by my publisher changed the title Rowena and the Dark Lord to Rowena and the Dark Lard. Sales were NOT stellar. However, the hilarity that ensued was probably worth the typo. Seems there were all sorts of people willing to suggest alternative plot lines for a book about Dark Lard. Many were a mite more entertaining than the original (she said ruefully.) 

Here’s a small sample: 
Protagonist moves back to Land’s End and opens up a bakery. Protagonist and love interest return to Land’s End and become pig farmers. 
Protagonist messes up another spell that causes all who look at her to turn into donuts. 

It’s enough to make a grown writer cry. Well, this time I did it myself. REALLY not cool to request a review for a book and misspell the title. No matter how it reads, "Cod Name: Gypsy Moth" is not a tale about an undercover fish running a bar off the coast of Newfoundland... 


That wasn’t enough.  People were quick to respond with suggested plot lines on Facebook.  Other authors (22 in fact) had to wade in <sic>.

he'd have to scale back his expectations - a bar like that would be underwater in no time.

and here's me waiting with 'baited' breath

Readers will dive right into that

That's a whale of a tale

that book will really "hook" a reader

Smells pretty fishy to me

definitely the wrong plaice at the wrong time.

We're really floundering here; no trout about it.

Okay!  In the interest of sane people everywhere, I’ll stop on that last one. 


You know how authors usually have a personal favourite?  This is mine.  The real name of the book? CODE NAME: GYPSY MOTH.


It isn't easy being a female barkeep in the final frontier...especially when you’re also a spy!
Nell Romana loves two things: the Blue Angel Bar, and Dalamar, a notorious modern-day knight for hire.  Too bad he doesn't know she is actually an undercover agent. 

The bar is a magnet for all sorts of thirsty frontier types, and some of them don’t have civilized manners. That’s no problem for Dalamar, who is built like a warlord and keeps everyone in line. But when Dal is called away on a routine job, Nell uncovers a rebel plot to overthrow the Federation.  She has to act fast and alone.

Then the worst happens.  Her cover is blown …

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